The Six Worst Excuses in the World by Abbie in Marlin (after Claire Bevan)

No 1: The dog ate it.

No 2: A big ugly pigeon came through my window and took it, but he dropped it and the dog ate it.

No 3: Santa came and saw my homework and took it to give to my teacher, but he dropped it down the black chimney while he was climbing up it and my greedy dog ate it.

No 4: We were baking and we accidentally got my homework mixed with cake ix, it was as slumpy as slime, it was gross and pink and my annoying dog ate it.

No 5: The muddy hand from ‘Diary of a Wimpy Kid’ came and took it off my clean kitchen side, as clean as a hospital ward. I grabbed it and put it back on the side, my dog jumped up and ate it.

No 6: Here is a pen from America with your name on it. Actually that one works rather well.

dghmwrk[Spellings and punctuation amended by teacher]

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